Willie McIntaggart 1959-2019

Captain Ulidia

We have all understood for some time that this day would certainly come and we are all, to a man, devastated at the loss of a colossus of a man, a leader and our friend. I really do not know where to begin. Tonight, Brian Kelly said, "I never understood what sort of men won the Victoria Cross, until I witnessed Willie dealing with terminal cancer. He had more courage than an army of men".

For now, I can't think of a more apt tribute. Suffer no more, my friend.

Harvest Doom

Bad Moon Rising - Kev's new Serpico

The moon was very nearly full, so the mongrel werewolves of Belfast were out in force on a Monday night at Ulidia. A total of 23 players ( that term requires a significant dollop of poetic license) were present on the green, grassy astroturf of strained groin. For those of you who are mathematically challenged, that is more than enough bodies to make two 11 a side teams - seems strange that there is often a struggle to get a team out when a competitive match beckons!

Several noteworthies were missing - Fuzz (injured), Ultan (recording a new album), Texas (his wife has a cold), Paddy (looking for Latino love), Ciaran (washing his hair) and Girly Bhoy (looking for his hair) - so it is no mean feat to put that many men on the pitch on a Monday night especially with Germany on the telly. And Belgium.

On the subject of missing star performers, it should be noted that Girly Bhoy has succeeded in hospitalising himself after a record breaking (his choice of words) South East Asian fandango.It would appear that excessive use of viagra is not conducive to a healthy lifestyle, so it isn't, especially if you have a rare form of cancer like! Consequently Girly is recovering in 6 North in the City and is receiving visitors. He hopes to be back on the streets in time for his annual ride at "The Ladyboys of Bangkok", after Oktoberfest.

On the pitch, both teams created enough chances to make it a high scoring draw but a combination of poor finishing and good goalkeeping meant that the difference between the teams was Cruncher.

Werewolves 6 - 2 Wolfmen

Ron will be collating names for the Xmas Dinner on 14 December very soon. No deposit is required. However, it is impolite not to attend if you have previously agreed to be there. In such circumstances you will be required to pay for your meal. The advice is not to put your name down unless you are confident that you will be there. By order of Ron Manager

Culchie Shoots, Culchie Scores.............For Once

Ron Manager cracks one off - a smile that is!

As Culchie stands in a pool of sweat (and vomit) he is astounded by the insipid sincerity of the gaffer's grin. What has he let himself in for? Well, there's a stupid question Culchie. You should have thought of that when you introduced Christine to Desertmartin's finest. The recent fitness regime has helped in the shedding of two stones (no, I couldn't believe it either) but let's hope it's not the important ones next to your cock, which is, at last, visible to your own naked eye for the first time since 2010. Ron is now expecting you to track back a bit more often than your customary once per match for your stint in between the sticks.

The Monday night game has improved since the move to Ulidia in January - something to do with home advantage? No. Just a better surface for the undoubted flair players in our midst. I would propose, at this stage of the year, that we have already seen the goal of the season - a 35 yard screamer from Fuzz to open Monday's account. Goals from Culchie, Soupy and Ferryman looked to have sealed it for Ron's selection but the Bogman's bhoys hit back with another from Fuzz, Noel and the winner from an embarrassed  Hustie as he scored with his left tit. So, 4-3 on the night, but football was the real winner as Culchie left with his tear soaked shirt.

The young man's nuptials take place this Friday (read the date on the shirt) and we wish him all the best on his new journey (to hell and back). All readers of the blog are invited to help him celebrate with free Jagerbombs at Crumlin Road Gaol from 19.30 or thereabouts in the evening. If you would prefer semtex to the other type of bomb, please remember that Crumlin is no longer HMP but a fine dining establishment in the heart of cultural North Belfast.

Hope to see a big turn out from the squad. All the best to Mr and Mrs Higgins - the happy couple!