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| Orange is the new Black |
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| Belfast Betis |
Old Firm Sunday and the Crocks of Orangefield took on the Masters of Ulidia, a bit like a Belfast Old Firm but without the flags, sectarianism or indeed, the football. The usual 11th hour apologies caused headaches for both team managers but headaches are something that they are used to on a Sunday morning. So, at high noon, the two teams took the field for the long awaited rematch after the initial meeting of the sides last March.
From the off, it was apparent that Burnsy had reshuffled his pack and introduced a few new faces. Ron, too, had reshuffled his pack and introduced some older faces holding firm to the belief that there is no substitute for experience and treachery. Orangefield attacked down both flanks but were unable to open the scoring until a set piece (read corner that bounced four times in the Ulidia box) that must have taken weeks of training to perfect, allowed the ball to be flicked past the helpless keeper and Orangefield got their first notch on the Aquinas bedpost. Ulidia were still playing some neat football and should have had the ball in the back of the onion bag when Ferryman broke clear, did the hard work in beating the hapless defender, but slapped his shot wide of the target. Feeling a bit sorry for himself, the Ferryman volunteered to make way for a very enthusiastic Culchie who stepped on to the pitch and passed the ball to the Orangefield centre forward for number two.
At last Ulidia woke up with a deft right foot shot from Madman that found the back of the net and Ulidia were back in the game. Not for long. A counter attack from Orangefield after the ball was lost in midfield, resulted in a volleyed goal into the Ulidia net, off the post, and the Orangefield players celebrated - as much surprised as Ulidia by the quality of the strike. The half was not over yet though. Doc, playing out wide for Orangefield, picked the ball up and ventured into the Ulidia box, tripping over himself acrobatically. The ref, who had a generally good game, blew up and the shock wave brought tears to the eyes of Blind Willie who was adjudged to have scythed the nimble Doc. The penalty was converted by Doc himself and the whistle for half time could not come soon enough for the Belfast Betis.
Half Time, Ulidia 1-4 Orangefield.
Both teams made changes for the second half but neither could make any difference to the scoreline as Orangefield netted four more times to Ulidia's once - a goal from debutant, Conor the Fish, continuing the tradition of goalscoring aquatic species following in the wavy fin flips of the lamented Billy the Fish. Bring back the fat slags says Girly Bhoy who was again conspicuous by his absence. An ideal foil for Cruncher, his non appearance undoubtedly contributed to this soundest of defeats and the biggest in the long illustrious history of this ancient team. However, no point in crying over spilt milk, but spill Ron's pint and that's another story.
Thanks to the ref who gave his services free of charge and thanks to Orangefield for the invitation back to the Cregagh Club. With tails firmly lodged between legs this didn't happen but when the re-rematch takes place, let's hope for a sunny Sunday afternoon in the summertime. Beer and Barbie?
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| Ron, Burnsy and the Ref compare facial ticks |
