Football's Coming Home

Texas remembers the last time England won anything!

A tragic night for England and their media roadshow was welcomed at Lough Moss when the evening's hostilities were brought to a close at 10pm. Every player ran to their mobile phones for the result of Team England's latest unsuccessful foray into Europe or beyond. The second half display was, apparently, little better than a pub team and it is alleged that Henry Armstrong has already been on the phone to invite the English minnows to the Armstrong Charity Cup this Christmas  - they could be the opponents that Cromac might beat this year. With the excitement generated by this news, our own match paled into insignificance.


For the previous hour, the two teams were generally evenly matched. A goal each from Ferryman and Young Fuzz kept honours even until the O'Keefe brothers decided that sibling rivalry was more important than the outcome of the game. Cruncher reminded Feargal who was boss when it came to pugilism while Feargal displayed a remarkable talent for dancing as he jigged and high kicked sending Cruncher reeling. However, there was no hiding place for the big striker and picking on Girly Bhoy did not end well as Girly Bhoy's knowledge of the moves of an exotic dancer proved his saviour as he shimmied through the static legs of the forlorn goal getter (his slippery show may have had something to do with the lube he regularly employs before exercise).


As a result of this sideshow, Young Fuzz took advantage to complete his hat trick and Daddy Fuzz kept it in the family with a robust boot from 20 yards out. Blind Willie was distraught and agonised at the lack of penetration from his team mates, especially Girly whose acts of penetration are legendary, but not tonight.


Finally, it's good to be back up and running with the blog for another week before the summer break. This might be a good time to remind players that we have two tables to fill for the Dessie Armstrong Charity Formal on November 26th. This event raises funds for the Children's Hospice and is run by Henry Armstrong MBE, the long suffering charity fundraiser of the Ormeau Road. To date, he has raised in excess of £100,000 for the charities and recently made a substantial donation to our own fundraising this year for Weiry's Buffs. (Incidentally, the final total was almost £10,000 when gift aid was added so thanks again to everyone who contributed.) Five players are currently committed to this event (Marty, Kevin, Noel, Ron and Fuzz) but there is space for five more. These places will be allocated on a first come first served basis so please get back to me as a matter of urgency if you are interested. No payment is required before August but it would be useful to have the names of five more interested parties as soon as possible.


Brian Kelly, whose punting has him banned from Paddy Power, is backing Belgium for a first European Championship. Keep your money for the Armstrong Charity Formal is my advice.


Iceland                              Poundland


Bogman                             Blind Willie
Wee Fuzz                           Ferryman
Fuzz                                   Feargal
Cruncher                            Deeno
Jolinho                               Culchie
Marty                                 The Don
Gaz                                    Jack
Texas                                 Girly
Ultan                                   Noel