Friday 4 March 2016

The Sweeney

The Demon Barber of Ulidia


Thursday's action at Queen's was unique in that it witnessed the oldest footballing debut in history. Sweeney McFlynn turned out for Blind Willie's team and certainly left his mark - a six inch contusion just above Kev's ankle. A scoring debut too as the visually afflicted selection ran out winners on the day. Sweeney (name attributable to his new profession in the ground maintenance sector) celebrated with a lock of pints in the Errigle, leading Ron Manager astray and as result, he is grounded for the weekend!


A slow start to the proceedings as both teams got the measure of each other, it took Diarmuid "The Duckman" Brankin to break the deadlock tripping over a sliderule pass from the Blind team captain to settle the nerves. It was a thrilling return to the PEC for the big Farmer who loves to entertain the teams with his persistent Colemanballs commentary. Like Girly Bhoy, he likes to score, but there the similarity ends. The Duckman will only partake of thoroughbred Irish ladies and has a particular penchant for County Antrim descendants of Finn McCool. Girly's love of ladies from the East does not inspire the Duckman although he has entered into protracted discussions with the Chinese restauranteurs of the country with regard to his salted duck egg product. A mighty aphrodisiac, Girly Bhoy is pushing the sale of these on his Taiwanese TV show - " Working for the Yankee Dollar".


Unfortunately the injury list continues to grow ahead of Sunday's Mother's Day Challenge Match. I hope the mothers are up to it! A serious injury to Girly required an overnight stay in a private medical institution where he was attended to by some fine Philippino professionals. He is expected to make a full recovery but his acting career is on hold until his wound heals!


Barbers                   Hairdressers


Sweeney                  Kevin
Willie                        Rory
Noel                         Vincent
Duckman                 Tom
Trevor                      Gaz
Marty                       Sean





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