Lockdown Blues

Don't argue with the "Ulsterman"

In recent weeks, months and soon to be years, it has not been possible to switch on thon fancy flat screen without encountering the bake of the beast of Ulidia. If you scan your DAB receiver, you will also find a local or national station (international if you're that way inclined) broadcasting the thoughts of Chairman Power. What the fuck is going on? Ultan (Irish for Man of Ulster according to the academic tweets) at this moment in time, is the man to go drinking with, but by the time the pubs reopen it could be somebody else. Rest assured, it won't be Culchie, unless you enjoy riding home in the company of paramedics! Many of us were unaware that Ultan is Ireland's foremost authority in virology. Like Cuchulain, he has attained legendary status during the period of crisis that we have all been subject to. Unlike Cuchulain he has not yet lost his head although how he has managed to remain cool under cross examination by Sheriff Fatman is a credit to his ancestors, both mythical and genetic.

From my own position (at home, next to computer), I have to admit that I am becoming somewhat overwhelmed by an urge to leave the confines of my limited space to venture into the relative unknown. I haven't been to the shops, pub or anywhere in the company of humans in over eight weeks. I have to thank many of you (Sean, Ron, Mark, Stevie, Geordie and others) for keeping the cupboards fully plenished. Like most, I was fine with this for a while but I am having withdrawal symptoms from no football (attempting to play and watch), no socialising, no travel and no idea when any of that is likely to change. I'm fed up with bullshit politicians contradicting each other and themselves. I can't believe that I applauded Piers Morgan (metaphorically) for his grilling of some Tory sap on Breakfast TV a few days ago. Like everyone else, I applauded at 8pm on Thursday evenings for a couple of weeks until I realised it was just another statist ruse to ease the government's embarrassment for not paying those key workers what they deserve. Applause doesn't put food on the table. So, I'm a bit pissed off, but imagine having been in hospital since the start of March, pre lockdown! Well, our own Girly Bhoy is that girl/boy/man/ladyboy! He has had a scary time. He's in the City/Nightingale Hospital at ground zero but the good news is that he is responding to chemotherapy. He has been in touch with Ron Manager and myself but I have no doubt that he would appreciate a text or PM from some of you.

Still thinking of Ting Tong 27

So these photos are shared with his permission. He is hopeful of making it to the Christmas Dinner and to be fair, he looks like he could do with a good feed. Phase 5 of the "Lockdown Ease" is reopening pubs and restaurants. I hope that we can all be at the Christmas Dinner. We could get Ultan to invite Sheriff Fatman but he might eat all the grub.

Here's hoping everyone is keeping fit and healthy. We will get back to kicking each other some day, but not until Ultan says so. In the meantime, be good to yourself.